Bourbon Tears

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Bourbon found her way around the base of my skull this morning as I lay there almost-awake and not-quite-asleep

It’s been so long since she had the opportunity to leave traces of herself behind and as I felt her linger, I made a promise that was witnessed by the god of my own understanding that this was a one-of, a not-going-to-happen-ever-again moment

For I am not the same person i was and as much as I love her fire, our dance together is not worth the dull ache of the morning after

Her burn filled me with courage to ask the thing I was afraid to ask and when the answer came, her roar helped numb the shock of the answer and we sat there together, the patient and the medicine,

Breathing and trying to assimilate the damage the words left, without causing more

Because I am wiser than I was, in that moment before voices could catch air and get too-loud and before unkind things could be said and too difficult to unsay, I bid her goodnight and took myself upstairs with her grounded sister,

Water

And fell down on a soft bed with a warm dog

My attempt to walk away stirred her heat further and before I realized it, a full storm came alive in the doorway until it was almost-but-not-quite-too-late and again,

Fell down on a soft bed with a warm dog

With my head spinning, my heart aching; with the comfort of knowing the crickets were outside my window, the stars were above the clouds in the sky and that time (eventually) heals all, she lulled me into darkness.

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