There is a fleeting moment between a question and an answer, that lasts for hours and hours and in a blink, it’s over.
We do our work and we stretch until we think our fingers have grazed the edges, and when the cloak is pulled back to show us more of the map we have only imagined in the way that only we can, the truth of what lies ahead knocks us to our knees and we realize that we must find a way to walk through fire so that we burn off what we no longer need, so that we can stretch even further and hold even more.
The understanding rolls over us like waves and in their wake, we can full the slow tug under; It’s too much; I’m too tired; I/m scared…and before we know it, we have surrendered our hearts, much like laying down our swords—we will die here, on the journey—we cannot go further, we cannot imagine taking one more breath, or one more step; and so let the darkness fall.
From under the cloak that holds the map we have been shown comes a voice and she says,
Rise up, daughter—you must inhale and exhale and you must drag yourself forward until you can walk and you must believe in yourself and all that I have taught you. I showed the darkest parts of what you can’t imagine exists because you must feel it and be singed by it and the memory of it must be seared into your heart so that you know true suffering. you must not be afraid to look him in the eye and you must grow your kindest, stronger and you must grow your love bigger, still—this is the path and the only one for you, so rise up.
We will feel a ripple move through us; with every word, we know it to be true.
We will rest here for awhile, though, in the embrace of a great buffalo; we will let the answers settle until they become a part of us like the stars in the night sky;we will practice lengthening our arms and expanding our hearts and when we are ready, we will step back in, with more questions.